It happens to everyone sooner or later – you and your partner don’t agree on some aspect of parenting. Even two people who are generally on the same page can find themselves disagreeing from time to time, and when you throw in the wildcard aspect of a child in the mix, people can come to different decisions, and tempers can flare.
That’s alright; it’s a perfectly normal part of parenting. What’s important is to get back on the same page quickly. There are several tactics and techniques you can use to help nip these disagreements in the bud.
As with anything else in a relationship, communication is key. Even when disagreements aren’t popping up, it’s useful to pick a time each week to sit down and talk things over – point out what’s working and what’s not, and come up with plans to address issues in the future. Sometimes, your partner will have a perspective you don’t, and will bring something new to the table, allowing the both of you to solve a problem.
When you blame each other for problems, you’re creating a stressful and anxiety-filled atmosphere for your child. That’s bad for their development and mental health. Even if you’re angry at how your partner has behaved, avoid throwing around blame. Instead, talk about how you feel, and how the family as a whole can avoid similar situations in the future.
I’ve never seen a case where a couple disagree on every aspect of parenting, even if they’re not on great terms otherwise. That common ground can form the basis of a parenting strategy, even if it’s on a very basic level – bedtimes, healthy eating, etcetera. You can use that common ground as a baseline, and point to it if you feel your partner is straying from what you both believe is important. Compromise is also important; there are situations in which neither of you is in the wrong, and a healthy middle ground is the best solution for the entire family unit.